I Ate All Four Krispy Kreme ‘Ghostbusters’ Donuts

If there’s something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call?

Well, that depends. Is the “something strange” a bunch of ghosts? Then you call the Ghostbusters. If it’s a bunch of Ghostbusters-themed donuts, and you want someone to eat them all? That’s when you ring me.

Why do I choose, of my own free will, to eat every item on chain restaurant menus inspired by movies? At this point, my arteries are so clogged, I can barely remember. All I know is if there’s a steady paycheck in it, I’ll eat anything you say — up to and including Krispy Kreme’s brand new Ghostbusters donuts, which were unveiled this week to mark the occasion of the franchise’s 40th anniversary.

While these four donuts are new, turning Ghostbusters in movie-food fodder is not. Since the mid-1980s, Ghostbusters has been one of the most merchandised brands in all of Hollywood. There have been Ghostbusters breakfast cereals, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire Flamin’ Hot Smoky Ghost Pepper Puffs, a Ghostbusters burger with a black bun, and, of course, a Ghostbusters drink — the famous Ecto Cooler, which became so beloved it outlived The Real Ghostbusters cartoon show that inspired it. (I can’t find a picture of it, but I would swear there was a Ghostbusters flamethrower at some point. Maybe I’m confusing that with another film.)

READ MORE: I Also Ate Everything on Denny’s Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Menu

This isn’t even the first time Krispy Kreme made Ghostbusters donuts — although previously you would have had to travel to South Africa to eat them. Not this time, as the chain’s domestic outlets are now offering four different Ghostbusters-themed sweets (plus a vaguely Ecto Cooler-ish beverage called “Slimer’s Slime-ade” that comes in “signature ectoplasm green”) just in time for Halloween.

Did I walk away from this latest culinary outing saying “We came, we saw, we kicked its ass!”? Or do these donuts bust some heads, gastrointestinally speaking? I ate them all — here’s what I thought…

If you want to try them for yourself, the Krispy Kreme Ghostbusters menu is available for a limited time. And now, as a duly designated representative of the City, County and State of New York, I order you to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to your place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension. As for me, after housing a box of Krispy Kremes, I feel like I just got whacked up with about 300 cc’s of Thorazaine. I’m gonna take a little nap now. Fingers crossed my stomach is not headed for a disaster of Biblical proportions.